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Musicians/Music Groups Fan Fiction >> Avenged Sevenfold

The following is a work of fiction. Any statements regarding any person, place, or other entity (real or imaginary) is the sole responibility of the author of this work of fiction. Fan Works Inc. takes no responsibility for the content of user submitted stories. All stories based on real people are works of fiction and do not necessarily reflect on the nature of the individuals featured. All stories based on other copyrighted works are written with authors knowing that these works violate copyright laws.

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You don't see me!
By Deathbat_86

 



        
Threw you the obvious
And you flew with it on your back

A name in your recollection
Down among a million same


Watching him is like an
endurance trial. It's always been like an endurance trial. He strides into a room, confident and
comfortable in his own skin, throws me that breath taking smile, ruffles my hair like I'm 13 then
greets me with a cheery, ``Hey kid'' I roll my eyes and sigh inwardly. ``I'm not a kid'' I tell him
for the billionth time. He grins, dimples denting his far too pinchable cheeks. ``Sorry kid'' he
says, just to grind my fucking gears. If he wasn't the most perfect man in existence I would scoot
my ass off this chair and throw it at him. I sigh and look at the floor. What does it matter
correcting him. In his eyes, I'll always just be a ``kid'' He finds it impossible to take me
seriously. Even when I tried to lay my heart on the line and tell him how I felt about him, he still
shrugged it off with a grin and a hair fuck up. Maybe he would have paid more attention if I'd
actually come out and said what I wanted to say but…… true to form. I failed
spectacularly and ending up just kind of hinting that in fact, this ``kid'' thought the world pretty
much started and ended at his fucked up crow feet. But to him I'm just the little sister of the girl
he's into. I may as well be one of his fucking fans for the amount I matter to him.

Difficult not to feel a little
bit
Disappointed and passed over


        
See, my sister met Matt Sanders at
an Avenged Sevenfold concert a few months back and they started ``hanging out.'' She decided to
``keep him in check'' she'd bring me along one of the first times she met up with him. Probably
thinking she wouldn't be tempted to fuck the beautiful man if her kid sister was sat around playing
gooseberry. So I went and sat and played fucking gooseberry while Matt got to know my sister and she
pretended she was even slightly interested in anything he had to say. I love my sister but FUCK that
girl is fickle. She wasn't bothered who he was or what he was into. She saw a huge pair of tattooed
arms, broad shoulders and a cute smile and that was the start and finish of her interest in him. Why
she kept going to see him was beyond me. He'd not given it up in months so she must have really
wanted, what she referred to as ``A ride on that'' to still be hanging around. Unlike her, I was
actually interested. On the times she'd ``go powder her nose'' which essentially translates into
``have a piss'' I'd be left with him in awkward silence. Until eventually I just got fed up and
started talking. Now I probably knew more about him than she did and yet SHE was the one who had his
attention.

When I look right through,
See you naked but oblivious



        
We surprisingly got on pretty
well. He was funny. This walking bicep was actually a really nice guy. Sweet, funny, smart and kind
of shy. My sister didn't see past the filled out shirt and tensed muscles to actually notice there
was a person underneath and the more I got to know him the more it surprised me that he would go for
someone like her. Put his time into someone who was so completely shallow that you'd have trouble
drowning a fucking ant in her. But….he kept calling and inviting us out so what the fuck
could I do? Unfortunately though, it took very little time for me to start to pick up on the little,
insignificant things about a person that will inevitably drive a person either crazy in love or just
plain crazy. In my case, it was crazy in love. Like the way Matt would fidget with his hat when he
was nervous. Or the way he covered his flaws with humour. Or the way he carried himself like he
couldn't give a fuck when actually he was one of those strangely self conscious guys even though he
had nothing to be self conscious about. My sister saw him as a walking, talking conquest with
dimples. She didn't notice if his smile was faked or he was feeling down. But I did.


And you don't see me



        
His smile today was forced. His ``Hey Kid'' didn't have that same happy ring to it, even though the
tone of voice he used was pretty much identical. ``You alright Matty Moo?'' I ask. He grins and nods
``Sure I am'' he shrugs. He's lying. His tongue pokes out to fiddle with his lip ring. His body
language is hunched. He's having an ``insecure'' day. I raise an eyebrow and stare at him until
finally he relents his ``look anywhere but at the kid'' act and turns to face me. ``What?'' he asks.
Another forced smile. I tilt my head to the side. ``Where's my wonderful sister?'' I ask him. He
sighs and shrugs. ``Got held up or something. Said she'll be here in a hour'' I roll my eyes. Great.
Sister stood him up now he's stuck with me and he feels like shit. Awesome sis. Nice fucking going.
``Want me to take off?'' I ask. He smiles. Genuine. Dimples. Good going me. I mentally hi 5 myself.
``Nah. Hang around. She said she won't be long'' he shrugs. I nod and study him a second. He leans
against the back of the sofa and sighs again. Quietly enough so I'm not supposed to hear it
but……unfortunately for him, I can read him like a book. ``Want a hug?'' I offer with a
childish grin. He laughs slightly and looks as though he's considering it. ``You look like you need
one. It's alright. You might be as big as a house but every motherfucker on this earth needs a hug
sometimes'' I laugh. He rolls his eyes and nods, holding his arms out. I hop off the sofa and dive
on him, giving him the biggest bear hug. He laughs as his arms wrap around me and he slaps my back
gently like he's trying to make me bring up wind. Fuck. Why did I voluntarily get myself in such
close proximity to him. Not only does his hug make me feel like I've falling into a whole world of
steady, sturdy snuggie, but he smells good too. Fucker. Like being buff and gorgeous isn't enough.
Would it KILL him to smell like feet??? He chuckles and untangles me from the hug. ``Thanks Kid'' he
smiles. I feel kind of dazed and look up into his far too perfect eyes, screaming at him that he's
way to good to be kept waiting. He's way too good to be a conquest. He's way too good to be anything
other than completely and utterly adored for everything he is and ever will be. All without saying a
word. The eye contact lingers for a minute and then he smiles and ruffles my hair again before
heading into the kitchen.

But I threw you the
obvious
Just to see if there's more behind the
Eyes of a fallen angel,
Eyes of a tragedy




        
ARRRRRGHHHHHHH. He's such a fucking idiot. I have to physically stop myself from storming into the
kitchen after him and writing, ``I'M CRAZY ABOUT YOU, YOU FUCKING LOON'' In
ketchup……on his face. Even then he probably wouldn't have a clue. He'd just read it
backwards in the mirror and ask me what a ``Nool'' was. So I don't. I restrain myself, fall down
into a chair and listen to him singing in the kitchen as he fucks about with dishes. ``Hey, your
sisters going to be a little while longer but I made food so….you wanna eat?'' he shouts. I
sigh and roll my eyes. ``Has she text you again?'' I ask in reply. More dishes clattering. ``Yeah.
She's gotta finish something off at work. Said she'll be here as soon as she can. But there's no use
you waiting till she gets here if you're hungry now'' he shouts. I have to stuff my hand into my
mouth to stop from screaming at him to grow a pair and tell the beast not to bother coming round at
all. My sister can be such a bitch. ``Not very hungry'' I mutter. He pops his head round the kitchen
door and smiles so sweetly it makes me want to cry…or crawl inside myself and vomit kittens
and rainbows and skittles and flower filled fields of adorableness. ``You gotta eat kid'' he says. I
sigh and trudge to the kitchen, dragging my feet like a disobedient child. Well he calls me kid so
why the fuck shouldn't I act like one. My sister has my favourite teddy bear and I want it because
she doesn't even cuddle it but she won't let me have it so I'm going to have a tantrum. I tuck my
bottom lip back in and stop dragging my feet before I get into the kitchen. My tantrum will have to
wait until the beautiful man is elsewhere. The kitchen table is set in what I imagine is a guys idea
of ``romantic dinner'' which basically consists of wonky placemats, single candle which is poking
out of an old beer bottle, mismatched plates and cutlery on the wrong sides. My heart just flopped
into my fucking shoes. HE MADE AN EFFORT AND SHE'S NOT EVEN HERE. I swear, the more he is amazing to
me, the more I hate my bitch of a sister for not bothering to show up on time. ``Matt….why do
you do this?'' I ask as he heaps a mountain of food onto a plate for me. ``Do what?'' he says,
frowning slightly. ``Go to all this trouble for her? I mean……it's not like she goes
out of her way to show her appreciation is it?'' I mumbled. He smiles. Forced. No dimples. ``It's
alright. She just get held up'' he shrugs. ``Well….if a guy did this for me, least I could do
is make sure I was here on time'' I grumble. Yeah I sound bitter but fuck it, I AM bitter. I'm also
hoping he'll get the fucking hint. But once again, he doesn't.

Here I am expecting just a
little bit
Too much from the wounded




        
I sit and eat. Matt stands by the sink and looks out of the window. Every time a car slows down he
fiddles with his hat. Nervous bastard. She doesn't deserve it. I choke down as much food as I can
before I snap. Serious fucking rage explosion imminent. ``Matt will you SIT DOWN. A watched bitch
sister never arrives'' I sigh. He turns and raises an eyebrow. ``Why you so hard on your sister?''
he smiles. I shrug and throw my fork down. ``I just….'' I pause while my mind decides now
would be a good time to start yelling at me for being so spineless. TELL HIM. TELLLLLLLLLLL HIM. ``I
just don't get why you let her treat you like this. I'm sorry Matt but….we've got to know
each other pretty well right?'' I ask. He nods. ``Well……it's not like this is the
first time she's lumped me on you and then gone AWOL is it? And you cooked and you made an effort
and I guess it just pisses me off that she doesn't even fucking bother to be on time. You're a nice
guy Matt. You deserve someone who will show up'' The end of my rant is totally feeble and I'm more
than aware that calling him a nice guy has made my cheeks feel a little too hot for my liking. He
shuffles around the sink then smiles (forced) and shrugs. ``She got caught up at work. Give her a
break'' I sigh and move my food round my plate. I intend on giving her a break if she doesn't hurry
her ass up. The thing that bothers me most is, he's acting like he doesn't care but….there's
something not right. He seems weird. To be completely honest…..he seems hurt.


But I see, see through it all
See through, see you



        
He waves it off like it's nothing. He keeps her food warm and keeps the wine chilled and shrugs it
off like he isn't bothered but he's done this for her and he IS bothered. And I'm bothered now too.
In my eyes, doing anything even slightly hurtful to Matt is like kicking a puppy. And it isn't
really the fact that he cooked. It's just the fact that she's pelting him with all these excuses, no
of which are true because I know for a fact she finished work before I set off over here, it's
just… I feel so awful for him. I wonder why he's putting up with it. It isn't like he's known
her forever. We're both pretty new in his life so why make excuses for her? Maybe because she's
everything I'm not physically. Tall, glamorous, blonde, slim, gorgeous, confident. And she knows it.
I may be a short ass, freckled weird kid in a hoodie but at least I have a sense of decency. At
least I don't just see Matt as 6''2 worth of walking muscle. I don't judge him by how impressive
he'd be on my arm. By how jealous my friends would be when I walked into a bar with him. There is so
much more to him than just a nice body. So fucking much more.

'Cause I threw you the obvious
To see what occurs behind the
Eyes of a fallen angel,
Eyes of a tragedy



        
I wait another hour and there's
still no sign of my wonderful sister. Matt retreats to the living room and sits in a chair. The TV
is on but he's just looking at the floor. She's not going to show. Both of us know it but neither
want to admit it. I watch him as he sits, leant forward, elbows rested on his knees, hands linked,
eyes seeming focused on the carpet. ``Matt….she's my sister and I love her
but……fuck her dude. Don't put up with this shit.'' I sigh. He smiles (forced
AGAIN!!!!) and shakes his head. ``It's alright. I don't mind. Works work isn't it'' he says.
``Yeah….but this is shitty of her. Really fucking shitty. I'm not even supposed to be the one
who's into you and I'm fucking here. What's so important that she cant be too?'' I am aware that my
temper is pretty much gone and now I'm mad at him for being such a doormat. His head snaps up as
though I've said something that's struck a chord. ``What does that mean?'' he frowns. I frown too.
Ok now I'm confused. What does what mean? ``What do you mean you're not SUPPOSED to be the one?'' My
heart sinks. Oh shit. Potential rumbled situation. Think up an excuse. THINK UP AN EXCUSE. ``I just
mean that…….'' I search for a valid explanation and come up with nothing. So I do the
next best thing, wing it. ``Look, she's the one you're into. You're the one she's into. Yet you're
sat here with her little sister looking like you've been kicked in the face because she hasn't shown
up. All I'm saying is……why the fuck should you take that from a girl you've known a
few months?'' He fidgets again. Ants in his pants. I can tell by his face he's trying to cook up
some wonderful defence for my perfect sister. I sigh. I've had enough now. I honestly can't sit and
listen to him try to defend her once more. If I do I'll punch him…..or cry…..or both.
``Doesn't matter. I'm going to take off.'' I sigh. He looks momentarily shocked but nods anyway.
``Alright.'' he says. That's it? THAT'S IT?????? That's all I get. I try to do him a favour. Try to
keep HIM from getting that wounded puppy look on his oh so beautiful face and all I get it
``Alright'' I sigh and stand up. ``See you Matt'' I mumbled, walking out and slamming the door
behind me.



Oh well, oh well
Apparently nothing,
Apparently nothing at all



        
I notice him at the window as I get in my car. He needs to seriously wipe that forlorn look off his
face before I burst into tears. I already feel like I've swallowed a golf ball. Looking at the guy
I'm pretty much in love with looking so sad is just a little bit too much for me to bear. I take a
deep breath and start my car. Even if I did cry it wouldn't matter to him. I guess I really am just
the ``kid'' sister of the girl he wants to be with.

You don't, you don't
You don't see me



        
I drive away from his
house, wait till I'm off his street then finally I allow myself to cry. I cry for how upset he
seemed, I cry for how much I hate my sister, I cry for how much he means to me but mostly I cry
because no matter what, it's always going to be her. I might as well just be another face in the
crowd. The way I feel about him doesn't even register. I don't register. He feels nothing for
me……so that's how I feel about myself because yeah, it may only have been a few months
but I have fallen so fucking hard. And without him to return how I feel, I might as well BE nothing.



You don't, you don't
You don't see me




        
Matt threw away the rest of the food. She'd gone. Her sister wasn't coming and even if she did it
wouldn't matter. He'd met her sister and initially that was what took his eye. But then he met her
clumsy, outspoken, car crash of a little sister and everything had changed. Thoughts flew out of her
mouth before her brain had even processed them. She was direct and brash and opinionated and Matt
adored her. He called her ``kid'' but to him she was so much more than that. Her sister may have
been the one with the outstanding body and the natural beauty but….she was the one who
mattered. Her beauty was clumsy and accidental. Her clothes were constantly half on half off, her
hair was never neatly styled or perfectly dyed like her big sisters was…but she had that
sparkle in her eye. That ``I don't give a fuck'' air about her that Matt had quickly learned was a
cover for how she really felt. He could read her so well and it seemed like she could read him, so
why the fuck was she so hell bent on her sister being with him. He didn't want her big sister. That
was just a cover so he could keep seeing her because he was too much of a pussy to just man up and
tell her that actually, it wasn't her sister he was after, it was her. And now she'd stormed out in
a huff. He'd defended her sister because he felt he had to. What she didn't know was….tonight
was supposed to be the night he told her how he really felt. What she didn't know was that her big
sister had never actually been invited. It was all for her. But she kept bringing her sister up
which in Matt's eyes translated as, she didn't feel the same way about him. She was so set on her
sister being with him. She wouldn't have been so determined to her her sister there if there was any
possibility of her feeling the same way about him. And as the night wore on, he convinced himself
more and more that she just wanted her sister there so that she could leave. Nope. He might as well
just give up. He was crazy about her but she didn't notice. He may as well have been just another
face in the crowd.


You don't, you don't
You don't see me at all!





 

The preceeding was a work of fiction. Any statements regarding any person, place, or other entity (real or imaginary) is the sole responibility of the author of this work of fiction. Fan Works Inc. takes no responsibility for the content of user submitted stories. All stories based on real people are works of fiction and do not necessarily reflect on the nature of the individuals featured. All stories based on other copyrighted works are written with authors knowing that these works violate copyright laws.

Please see the Terms of Service for more information.

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