Anime/Manga Fan Fiction >> Fushigi Yuugi
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You Moron You
By Houng Te
>From: dx515@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Houng Te)
One of these days, I'll write a non yaoi story. But for the time being,
this is a Kouji/Tasuki piece so people who are iffy with that idea, I'm
Fushigi Yuugi isn't mine; it's property of Yuu Watase and Emotion.
Feedback, even flames and rebukes on my grammar skills, are cheerfully
Dedicated to one of the biggest Tasuki lovers alive, my good buddy Elena.
- - - - -
You Moron You
I believe I'm worthy of him. I'm smart, handsome, a brilliant
thief and I have impeccable taste in clothes. Who did you think gave him
those earrings he wears so often? In this world filled with morons,
cowards, freaks, people who can't colour coordinate their wardrobe, and
just plain all around losers, I'm sure I'm a relief to Genrou.
I love Genrou. He's standing on the top of the mountain at this
moment and damn, he looks good. The moon is unusually bright and cast a
faint silver glow around his lithe figure and within the crook of his
arms. He stands with his hands on his hips, his feet spread apart and his
shoulders back. He looks like the icon of confidence and invincibility;
nothing can touch him.
But I hope to change that. He's coming down the mountain now.
There's something in the way he walks that makes one think he owns the
mountain. And there's *that* smirk on his face. The tilted smile that
makes a million women forget to breathe and fall on their knees. And send
one foolish man to heaven and back.
He comes up to me and looks me in the eye. We're almost the same
height. From here, even the dim moonlight, I can see the eagerness in his
eyes, the ways the green gleam around his dark pupils and within the
bright whiteness. "The house is a couple li away," he informs me. "If we
start now, we can get there by tomorrow morning."
"Did you see any horses nearby or any light in the window?" I
He shakes his head. "There's no sign that there's anyone there or
anywhere nearby." His smile widen. Dear God, I'm such a idiot. I forget
how to breathe. "We can make it there before Eirken without any problem."
He turns around and starts to walk away.
I feel the bottom of his dress shirt brush against my leg and I
follow him. We walk through the quiet of the night, surrounded by
darkness. The sky above us in a murky velvet blanket dotted by a stray
star or two. There's no noise other than the wind and our footfalls
against the hard mountain floor.
"Do you think we'll beat them, Genrou?"
He turns his head without stopping to give me a quick smile. "Of
course we will, Kouji. You know that." He looks ahead of him. His hair
is being ruffled by the breeze and it takes all my strength to keep my
trembling fingers from running through it. "We'll get to the house before
Eirken does, steal the jewel, run out into the night, and laugh at him the
next time we see him."
I love his confidence. "But what if Eirken is already there?" I
question, but I already his answer.
"Then we'll beat the fucking crap outta them," Genrou crows. He
looks positively energized.
"Exactly," I agree, wanting to add to that energy. "We'll beat
them so bad they won't walk for a month. We'll make them regret the day
they met us!"
"We'll crush them like ants," Genrou adds. "They'll be on their
knees begging for mercy. But we don't give it to them. We'll be
ruthless. We'll be -"
I actually feel the splash before I heard it. The dark drops of
water hit the points of my cheeks and trickled down to my chin. Ripples
are bubbling and spreading out from the epicentre where Genrou has fallen.
His head pop up later, and he spit out some water. He looks pissed. "I
hate water," he snarls.
You know, I am in love with the man, but carrying him on my
shoulder while I waddle through the shallow lake isn't exactly my idea of
spending a romantic evening with the man I love above me. "Genrou," I say
in a bored tone, "the water only goes up to our waist."
He clings to my head. "SHUT UP!"
"You hammer!" I exclaim, walking a little faster. In my haste I
nearly trip over a stone that I can't see. Genrou shrieks into my ear as
I tip forward. Luckily, I stick my other foot and regain my balance.
"BACCA!" he screams and holds onto me harder.
It gives me an idea. I start to jump. "Hammer," I yell.
"You moron!" he shouts. "What the hell are you doing?"
I'm jumping higher and higher, my feet barely making a solid
landing as I go along. "Hammer hammer hammer!" I chant.
This is so much fun! "Hammer!" I jump even higher. He screams
even louder. "Hammer! Genrou's a hammer!"
"Kouji Stop IT!"
"Hammer!!" I'm getting high and really unstable. "You're such a
"KOUJI! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"
"Hammer hammer!" I jump but a rock rolls under my foot and next
thing I know, I'm completely submerge under water. The coldness and
density shocks me and I spring up, gasping for air. Genrou is nowhere to
be seen but I can tell from the ripples beside me where he has fallen.
I don't have much time.
As fast as I could, I make my way out of the lake. It's not easy
with heavy and wet clothes but I get onto land before I hear him surface.
I don't look back. I only think of running away. I like the colour of my
skin the way it is already.
An orange blur blind me for a minute. I smell smoke and hear a
satisfied chuckle behind me. Damn. I can't believe it.
The moron got me.
"Was it really necessary to burn me?" I demand with disgust.
He kisses his iron fan and tucks it back into his heavy dress
shirt. "Was it really necessary to drown me?" he retorts calmly. He
looks smug, despite the fact that he's dripping wet. He still looks
better than I do. I'm as black as a crow. There's still smoke rising
from my hair.
We reach the house. Much to my dismay, there's light in the
window. Shit, Eirken's there. I shoot Genrou a look. He doesn't appear
to be daunted. In fact, from the shine in his eyes, I say he looks
excited. He places a hand on my shoulder and leans in to whisper into my
ear, "You ready to kick some ass?"
I feel my hesitation ebb and my excitement grow. "Yes. Let's
We half crawl, half run to the house and perch ourselves under the
window. Laughter and drunk singing is floating above us.
"So when should we crash in?" I ask.
"In about few moments." He pulls out his fan and some sheet of
Oblivious to our surroundings, I query in at normal volume, "What
are you going write on the paper?"
"Shh!" He lays a finger across my mouth to silence me.
It was a mistake.
I can't help it. I lick at it gently, tasting a bit of salt as I
He's taken back. I can tell by the way he stares at me. I always
love his eyes. Cat's eyes, even more so now that they have that wide
rimmed, feral gleam to them. He doesn't move. I remain still. We simply
stare at each other, aware but unaware of what's going on around us.
I feel the corner of my mouth twitch into a faint smile. His hand
start to tremble and his eyes narrow slightly, now that he's over the
shock. He parts my lips with his finger and gently pushes it in. I open
my mouth a little more and close it when his fingertip inside.
In the back of my head, I hear the singing grow more guttural and
less verbal. The laughter is hard to separate from the banging on the
walls. The slamming on the ground. The opening on the door.
I pay them no heed. Instead, I focus my concentration on the
single digit that's slowly making its way into my mouth and on the eyes
that are piercing through mine with rapt fascination. Fingernail scraps
against the roof of my mouth and I run my tongue along the underside of
The door slam against the house's front wall. The thundering of
the footsteps, the loud brawling invade my ears but we can't hear them.
We only see each other. Nothing about us move except his finger and my
His finger is deeper inside and I'm sucking on it, completely
ignorant of the shouting behind us. The stamping and the laughing. The
yellow torch light that suddenly illuminates us, casting a brief red
blindness before we both mercilessly black out.
Someone wet touches my cheek. I open my eyes slowly to the
sensation but the room is wobbly. It's not rain, I know that. Rain was
never this warm. Another drop runs down my forehead. There's a gleam in
the left corner of my eye. The room is beginning to clear up. A voice is
beginning to make sense.
"Oh Kouji! I can't believe you're dead!! You were my dearest and
most cherished friend! How can I live without you? Why were you taken?
Why not me?"
Okay. This man wailing above me is an idiot. A big fucking
moron. The most stupid thing I have ever met in my life. I narrow my
eyes in annoyance and turn to look at him. "Don't bury me yet," I mutter.
His eyes widen unbelievably and he throws himself at me. "KOUJI!
YOU'RE ALIVE!" he screams.
He's an idiot, but he's my idiot. I forgive him in half a
heartbeat and we are cheering and laughing together. We would hug, but
our hands were tied behind our backs. Realizing this, I draw away from
him and sit down, turning my head away from him. I see the flash of light
again. "This is all your fault," I accuse.
He looks incredulous. "My fault!" he snaps. "What's with the
licking my finger? Taking my concentration off Eirken and the stinking
rest of them?"
"Who's the idiot that put a finger in my mouth?" I shot back.
The ropes are cutting my circulation as I try to pull my hands apart to
grab his neck.
"I was just trying to shut you up, you asshole! You were a dummy
to lick my finger!"
"Who are you calling dummy?"
"I only see one in this room."
"Don't talk so highly about yourself."
"I wasn't. I was giving *you* the benefit of the doubt."
"Oh, well, if it isn't the two love birds having a marital
We turn to see Eirken above us, dressed in those pathetic heavy
amour and that ridiculous hat. Now there's a guy who could take a few
fashion lessons from Genrou. He smile at us, which is a horrible sight.
I straighter my shoulder and do the most mature thing I can think of at
the moment. I stick my tongue out at him. "Go to hell," I swear.
He bellows with laughter. "I'm not going anywhere and by the
looks of things," he gives us a little snigger, "neither are you two." He
holds up his hand and I see what he has in it. Genrou's fan and magic
paper. My fighting stick.
Genrou is livid. His shoulders are heaving. "You are such a
coward," he spats. I'm outraged myself but that gleam flashes through my
mind as I turn again. It's then I noticed a heavy lump of dirt by my
left, a little bit behind me.
"Coward?" Eirken repeats with an air of disdain. "If I was a
coward, you would be dead. But I am a man."
This is where we both snort.
"And as a man, I decided to let you live and kill you after we
beat your ass up. Of course we'll be giving you two a chance to fight.
That would be only fair." He laughs as he leaves the room. "I'll be back
later with the rest of them and we'll finish you two runts then." The
door slams loudly and the hinges vibrate from the force of it.
"He's been eating onions again," Genrou notes dryly. He looks at
me. "I guess we'll just have to wait until he gets back and then hope we
can beat them all up." He notices the expression on my face. "What?"
I turn around so he could what I have in my hand.
"You found the jewel!" he whispers with feeling.
I turn and nod. "It was right behind me," I tell him. "I guess
Eirken didn't find it yet."
"They're always drunk," Genrou explains. "A bunch of idiots, if
you ask me." He looks at the jewel. "The edges look sharp." His eyes
light up and it's not long before I understand he's getting at.
I free him first, cutting the ropes with the jewel. I cut his
skin a bit, and I can hear his sharp intake of air when I do so, but being
the wonderful and brave man my Genrou is, he doesn't cry out. Now that
his hands are free, he unties me and we both get up, rubbing our wrists.
The door is unlock since Eirken doesn't think we're capable of
leaving with our hands bond. However he did leave two guards there but
Genrou and I take care of them easily. I take the stick the of the man I
knocked into unconsciousness and Genrou retrieves a sword. We quietly
shuffle to the other room where Eirken was partying with the rest of them.
The wall feel thin and brittle against our backs as we lean against it,
close to the door.
"Are you ready?" Genrou whispers.
I nod. "Let's go."
We both fly into the room, shrieking a war cry. The men were no
longer drunk, but nevertheless, they are no match for us! We knock them
down one after another. I crack one man's ribs and then turn to kick
another one in the mouth. I see hands and feet flying at me, but I block
them and jump kick them my way out. It isn't long before Genrou and I are
standing victors on a mountain of limp bodies. Now that's rejuvenation
Eirken is standing at the floor, his mouth open with awe and fear.
"So Eirken," I taunt, "how do you want to go?" Genrou is
chuckling beside me.
"Pl-pl-please," he begs, falling to his knees. "I-I-I didn't mean
anything. I just wanted the diamond. I just wanted..." I suddenly see
his eyes light up but it's too late. A heavy blow lands on my head and I
fall to my knees from the impact. I feel the sick. The room spins for a
minute and I see the dirty floor dance before me. Rough hands grabbed my
hair and a sharp blade is placed under my neck. I struggle for air.
"Good job, Sorka," I hear Eirken say. I look up. He's facing
Genrou who's looking at me with eyes filled with concern. His mouth is
open and I can see his hands trembling. "And look what else fell," Eirken
adds. He picks up the jewel that fell out of my shirt. It gleams in the
glowing dawn sunlight. For a moment, that's all I see.
Genrou retains his posture quickly and looks at me. "Kouji," he
says quietly, "you can get yourself out of that mess, can't you?"
I grin. "You know I can," I reply. I feel the fingers pull
harder at my hair and the sword dig harder into my throat. "Just get the
jewel back," I tell him.
Eirken speaks almost immediately. "You know," he starts, "I'm
willing to give the jewel to back to you," he says.
Genrou turns to him sharply. We both know he doesn't give things
without either a price or a plan. It's then, due from the different angle
that I'm held at, that I see Genrou's iron fan in Eirken's hand, hidden
behind his back. Oh shit. "Gen--" I try to warn him but feel my hair
being pulled back even more, cutting air from my throat. I can't speak.
"Ge.. G..." Fuck.
Genrou doesn't notice my attempts to get his attention. "What
will it cost?" he questions placidly.
The first thought I have was a horrible nightmarish one of Eirken
in those earrings, plus or minus a pretty flowery swinging skirt. The
second one is a promise to kill the sonofabitch. Making Genrou trade the
beloved earrings that I bought for him for an expensive jewel. And I know
Eirken isn't going give him the diamond. He's simply to burn Genrou with
his own fan. *His Own* fan, dammit. I grit my teeth in both pain and
Genrou, whose face had flushed at the surprise at the request,
suddenly lowers his head and smiles. "If you say so," he says. He
unhooks the earrings with ease and throws them at Eirken. I see the look
of satisfaction on Eirken for a moment. Just a moment. Before the
earrings can reach in his hand, Genrou leaps into the air and strikes with
his foot. Eirken whips out the fan. "LEKKA SHI--" Genrou's foot lands
in Eirken stomach. Eirken shouts and the jewel flies into the air.
Genrou catches it.
Sorka, foolishly, had been staring at the event the whole time.
His distraction gave me enough time to pull the sword away, twist his arm
as I went under it, and then knock him out with a blow to his head. They
both fall heavily against the wooden floor.
Genrou first puts the jewel in his shirt and then tosses me his
fan. Finally, he picks the earrings carefully off the floor. He wipes at
them slowly, as though he's polishing brass, and then puts them back on
and gives me one of those adorable smiles I love so much. "I would never
give those up," he assures me. "I would give that jewel up before I gave
"You really like those, don't you?" It feel good to know that he
likes those earrings so much. It's a warm, fulfilling feeling that goes
all the way to my toes.
He walks up to me and runs a hand through my hair. The action was
unexpected. His fingers send warm electric shocks down my neck and back.
My knees are shaking. "Of course I like them," he says. His smile is
mesmerizing. He leans over to my ear again. I feel his lips against the
lobe. "Haven't you figured out why, you moron?" he whispers.
He pulls back, his face purely triumphant. Probably proud that he
had manage to turn me into a graven image. He turns around and walks off.
I follow after him, dazed, shaking, but horribly happy.
Yeah, I'm a moron, but as long as I'm *his* moron, I don't give a
watashi wa watashi.
Neon Genesis Evangelion
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The preceeding was a work of fiction. Any statements regarding any person, place, or other entity (real or imaginary) is the sole responibility of the author of this work of fiction. Fan Works Inc. takes no responsibility for the content of user submitted stories. All stories based on real people are works of fiction and do not necessarily reflect on the nature of the individuals featured. All stories based on other copyrighted works are written with authors knowing that these works violate copyright laws.
Please see the Terms of Service for more information.