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Anime/Manga Fan Fiction >> Inu-Yasha

The following is a work of fiction. Any statements regarding any person, place, or other entity (real or imaginary) is the sole responibility of the author of this work of fiction. Fan Works Inc. takes no responsibility for the content of user submitted stories. All stories based on real people are works of fiction and do not necessarily reflect on the nature of the individuals featured. All stories based on other copyrighted works are written with authors knowing that these works violate copyright laws.

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What Never Was
By DarkCrystalis

 

What Never WasBy: DarkCrystalisDisclaimer: I own no one from any
animes.Summary: A bittersweet one-shot about a love that could have
happened; all of Kagome's withheld truths are revealed...Based on a TRUE
STORY.XxXxI had the chance I had always been waiting for; he finally
wanted me. He wanted me by his side, and I threw it all away. I had
waited for a whole year, and made it go to waste in the space of five
seconds.Why? I was scared.A lame excuse, but it didn't matter...even
after I denied him, things didn't sink in until later that night.What
had I done? It was a huge mistake, and I regret it even years later. My
love for him never died down, even after he found someone new to like,
and eventually came to love.

It was sad, really; I kept loving him for years afterwards, even when he
moved on...We could've had something, maybe.Tears formed at the corners
of my eyes. Even three years later I feel for him; even when he loved
another girl and had been with her for a while; even when a second came
along.Memories floated back to when things could have been...-----Back
two years ago, in December...Kagome had known him for about a year by
now, and they were fairly familiar with one another; they even went to
the same high school. She was staying at his house for New Year's, and
they watched a movie she'd brought over: Pirates of the Caribbean.
Before it started, however, he lay down on the couch, and got her to lay
down in front of him. After they'd gotten comfortable, he started the
movie, and they relaxed in one another's company. It was cold, so a thin
pink blanket was pulled over their bodies by him.Soon, Inuyasha began to
run his fingers through her hair, ``tsking'' her for all the knots she
had in it. He did it in a gentle manner, merely caring for her hair,
which was surprisingly comforting. After that was done, he then ran his
fingers down her arms in a feathery-soft manner, which made her relax.
In all honesty, Kagome had always hated the thought of being touched
softly; but for some reason, she didn't mind when Inuyasha did it.
Stopping and deciding to settle his arm around her waist instead, they
merely stayed close for the rest of the movie, keeping warm and enjoying
each other's company.-----However, about a month later, in
Janurary...The two of them were sitting in his bedroom in the same
office chair together, playing video games on the computer. They had a
wonderful time together, but time had run out for Kagome. She had to
leave to go home on the public bus, so that she wouldn't get into
trouble. It was already 12am, and if she didn't leave soon, she might
not catch the bus on time.Inuyasha decided to take her to the stop as
usual, because he worried for her. He always had done things like that,
ever since he'd known her. Whenever she spoke with him on the phone at
9pm, and told him she was going rollerblading, he'd always sigh in a
frustrated fashion, not wanting her to go out alone. It was obvious
Inuyasha cared a lot for her.Before they left the house, she watched as
Inuyasha put on his shoes in the doorway. His dark brown eyes lifted up
to her green ones after finishing the task, his black hair pulled back
from his face.For some odd reason, she knew that he was going to kiss
her. His face got a little closer to hers, and she didn't know what to
do. At first, Kagome froze, trying to think madly of what to do, but
nothing came to mind.Without even comprehending her movements, or
controlling them, she turned away, and pushed the glass door open.
Walking briskly down the sidewalk, she didn't wait for him to catch up,
or even turn around.Breathing heavily, she immediately bit her lip down
when he began to step in beside her. A tense silence filled the air, and
neither said anything to the other."I'm sorry," she muttered as they
walked slowly, not knowing what else to say.At first, he didn't reply,
which made Kagome instantly assume that he was angry with her.'I don't
blame him if he is', she thought to herself sadly."It's okay," he
finally responded.Kagome bit her bottom lip harder, not wanting to think
about what had just happened.Reaching the bus stop, Kagome looked at him
again, and then regretting it.Just taking a glance at him made her feel
like an idiot; a jerk; it dredfully reminded her of what she'd tried not
to think about.She'd ruined everything, but the worst was yet to
come...Hugging him lightly, she pulled away from the embrace."I'll call
you when I get home," she stated, as she always did.He nodded his head
in response, and watched her board the bus.As she moved further and
further away, she couldn't help but feel like she'd been torn from
him.'It's all my fault, all my own stupid fault...'-----When Kagome got
home that night, she called him."I'm home..." she stated dully, not
wanting to drag on a conversation."Alright," he responded, seemingly not
feeling like chatting, either.After another tense moment of silence,
Kagome broke it,"I'm going to bed."Inuyasha merely replied with an
"Okay" before she said goodbye hung up.It was so unlike both of them
that it made her emotions crumble like dry bread.She lay down onto her
matress, staring into the darkness of her room.Suddenly, she felt very
lifeless, and empty.-----Things, surprisingly, didn't deteriorate
between them.At first, things had been a little strange, but soon
enough, everything was how it used to be.They were friends once again,
and if you looked at things on the outside, it was as if the
near-kissing incident didn't even happen.However, on the inside, Kagome
hated herself. She hated what she'd done, and how she'd thrown
everything away...Inuyasha seemed okay about it, but Kagome couldn't
have been more depressed.She acted like her normal bubbley self, so that
no one would suspect it. In fact, Kagome didn't even talk to anyone
about it; things were just too painful to bare.Either way, Kagome didn't
want to ruin what they still had, so she convinced herself that their
old friendship was what she'd wanted all along....was that what she
wanted, though?-----Instead of keeping everything inside like she'd
wanted, Kagome confided in her friend, Kikyou.Kikyou also went to the
same high school as her and Inuyasha, and was even in her English
class.Kagome tearily told her of what had happened, while Kikyou merely
listened."It's okay," she'd told her repeatedly, but it didn't seem to
make Kagome feel any better."Thank you," Kagome answered after a few
minutes of deep breathing. She didn't want to cry about it; she'd only
feel worse.Kikyou didn't reply; she just continued doing the English
classwork.-----A couple months later, Kagome and Inuyasha went over to
KIkyou's house. Kikyou was a friend of Kagome's and Inuyasha's, so it
was natural for the three of them to be hanging out together.When they
walked down into her basement, Kikyou sat at the computer, typing away
on MSN. However, Inuyasha soon asked if he could get online.Nodding with
a smile on her face, Kikyou moved out of the chair so he could sit down.
She pulled a chair beside his, which was also beside Kagome's.The three
of them watched Inuyasha check who was online, and talk to a mutual
friend. He finished quickly, and then asked if Kikyou wanted to sign
back on.She nodded, and then smirked."I bet you can't guess my MSN
password," Kikyou said with a confident smile."I probably can," he said
in response, sitting and thinking for a moment.Typing in the password,
his facial feature didn't change when it signed Kikyou in on her MSN
account.Kikyou blushed slightly and looked away, before looking back at
him."How did you guess?"He smiled the tinyest of smiles, shrugging his
shoulders.

"It's obvious," was all he came up with."Really...?"Kagome looked at the
two of them, confused."What was the password?" she asked suddenly, not
understanding what was going on."Oh, nothing," Kikyou said abruptly, and
then smiling brightly. "I guess I'll have to change it back to the old
password now."Kagome sat there confused, unable to figure out what had
just happened.However, she'd find out later, and she wouldn't want to
know...-----"I still really, really like him though," she whispered to
Kikyou a couple days later as they did their classwork during
English.Kikyou looked over at her and smiled a small smile.

"Maybe you should tell him," she suggested, to which Kagome shook her
head vigoruously."No, if he still liked me, he would have said
something, don't you think?"Kikyou shrugged, once again not really
saying anything.Silently, she looked over to Kagome as she sighed
heavily, sadness etched onto her face; it was obvious she hadn't gotten
over him.-----Another little while later...Kagome, Inuyasha, Kikyou, and
Sango all went to the mall. They didn't exactly know what they were
doing, or what they were looking for, but the point was to hang out and
spend time with one another.Kikyou suddenly suggested that she would go
and get a drink, and asked Kagome to come along. Staring at her, she
smiled slightly, and agreed. They were just getting a drink; what was
the big deal?After going up the escalator, Kikyou stopped, and looked at
Kagome with a strange expression on her face."I have to talk to Inuyasha
downstairs, and it won't be pretty."Kagome was now more confused than
ever, not at all understanding what was going on."Can't you just tell me
whatever you're going to say right now?"Kikyou shook her head."No, I
promised I wouldn't say anything."Cocking her head to the side, Kagome
nodded more out of reflex than anything else.Walking back down to their
previous level, Inuyasha stood up from the table. Kikyou walked over to
Inuyasha, and stared at him."Are you going to tell her?" Kikyou asked
him, while he looked away. He didn't reply, so Kikyou looked over to
Kagome, a sympathetic emotion clearly on her face."Kagome, Inuyasha and
I are dating now."At first, Kagome was SURE that she'd heard her
incorrectly."What?" she asked in a whispered voice, immediately grasping
Sango's hand who was still sitting beside her in a chair.Kikyou didn't
say anything anymore, and before Kagome knew it, light tears streamed
down her face."How could you do this to me?!" she asked, deep hurt in
her voice.The droplets continually grew in weight and consistency, which
was what made her finally get up from the chair.A sob emitted from her
throat, before another and another followed. Looking to Sango for help,
she hugged her tightly, not looking back to Inuyasha and Kikyou.Bringing
Sango with her, Kagome sobbed and cried as they walked away.After
everything Kagome had told Kikyou, they still got together? How could
she do this to her?Kagome and Sango continued walking, taking the
escalator to the second floor of the mall. They immediately made their
way to the exit, which took them to the bus station.She continually
cried on the bus, while Sango sat beside her, and patted her shoulder;
Sango also vaguely knew of Kagome's favouring towards Inuyasha.When it
was Sango's turn to get off the bus, she waved and smiled sadly."Get
better," she said simply, not wanting to make Kagome more
emotional."Thanks," Kagome responded with a teary smile, dropping her
head into her lap.-----When she finally got home, she avoided everyone
and everything.In fact, Kagome went straight to her bedroom, and didn't
bother calling Inuyasha to let him know she'd gotten home safely.Laying
face-down into her pillow, Kagome wept. Her sobs grew louder and louder
with each image that passed through her mind, throwing herself further
and further into her bitter heart's turmoil.She feared of waking up the
rest of the household, but at the same time she didn't care. Kagome was
so miserable that she was beyond caring for anyone and anything; she'd
lost it.The sobs didn't slow, or decrease as normal; they just seemed to
increase more with each emotion that flowed through her.Her entire body
shook with the realization that the only person she'd truly loved was
taken away from her, by someone that was supposed to be her friend.
Kagome couldn't control the movement, and she didn't even bother trying
to.She cried for hours that night, right up until 5a.m. It sounded
ridiculous, but he was her first and only love; no one else had ever
mattered so much.Curling into a ball on her side, Kagome sighed deeply
over and over, furiously wiping away the tears from her red cheeks. Her
eyes were sore and also red from all the crying, but it didn't matter;
nothing mattered anymore.Exhausted physically and emotionally, Kagome
finally passed out after a few more hours of wallowing in her
depression.-----Days turned into a week, and even then Kagome weeped
every night. She weeped for what she'd given up, for what she could no
longer have. Her normally happy spirit had been shattered, and perhaps
would never be healed.She avoided speaking to Inuyasha during this time,
not wanting to cry to him over the phone. It was bad enough that she
cried this much; he didn't need to know about it.-----However, one day,
she wound up the courage to talk to him. No, not on the phone; that
wasn't an option.MSN it was.The conversation might have been a little
akward at first, but that didn't last for long.They chatted, as if
nothing had happened.Kagome asked how Kikyou was, and he replied fine;
things were going just fine for them.Kagome didn't know whether to laugh
from insanity or cry.Deep in her heart, she wished that things had been
horrible, and that they'd broken up. Yes, that's what she'd hoped for;
but alas, that didn't happen.Kagome's pure, innocent heart which wanted
the best for people wanted Kikyou to rot in hell at that moment; but did
that make her a bad person?She kept these thoughts to herself as she
chatted with Inuyasha, grateful that he wasn't ignoring her.It might
have sounded pathetic, but she was content to have this; even just
this...-----They grew closer during that year; he told her everything
and anything about their relationship, and the funny part of it all was
that she WANTED to hear. Oh yes, she wanted to hear about all the
arguements, sweet things, and everything else that happened between
them. Often times, she consoled him after an arguement, brought his
anger down to acceptable levels, and listened to him rant about the
relationship problems.Even still......she continually liked him;
although the liking had died down over the year. No, she'd never
forgotten about the night when she messed things up, or the night when
she'd been betrayed, nor would she ever. Despite that, despite
everything that had happened, she still liked him.Inuyasha didn't know,
and she made sure that he'd never find out.-----Over time, Inuyasha's
relationship problems with Kikyou got worse and worse. At one point, he
threatened to break up with her, which shook her up pretty badly. He
told Kagome all about her fakeness, and that he hated the way she was
manipulative, and a consistent liar. He hated the way she dressed like a
slut, and went clubbing, even though they were a couple.Kagome listened
as he told her over the phone, feeling nothing but sympathy for him.'I'd
never do that to you, Inuyasha,' she couldn't help thinking as he told
her of his problems.Occasionally she gave him her advice, whenever he
asked of it, genuinally wanting things to work out for them. If she
couldn't have Inuyasha, she at least wanted him to be happy with someone
else.-----After a year and a half, Inuyasha and Kikyou officially broke
up, and that was that.Kagome got to see him in person, but not until
months after the break up. Inuyasha was a fairly busy man, who didn't
have much time for friends.When she saw him, even though he tried to
hide it, she could tell he hurt. Whenever he spoke about her, bitterness
was clear in his voice.He resented her for everything that had happened
during their relationship, but he often spoke about how he still loved
her and wanted to protect her.Things didn't make sense to Kagome; how
could you love someone, and want to protect them, when you've broken up
with each other?She asked him this as they walked together, but he just
shook his head. He still cared, and that was all that mattered, Kagome
supposed.-----Months later, he got another girlfriend, but Kagome didn't
really care. He could do as he wished, right?The cycle continued,
hearing all about his relationship, and occasioanlly offering advice.
She seemed much nicer than Kikyou, but Kagome knew it wouldn't last. She
had that feeling in her stomach, it told her that it wouldn't last.And
she wasn't wrong, either; so when they broke up and decided to be
friends after three months, Kagome said nothing in
response.-----Inuyasha and I continually chat to one another, although I
rarely see him. Things don't matter, though; I could still count on him
to be there for me, even after everything we've' been through.He's much
different today than on the first day I met him in our grade 10 Math
class, but that doesn't matter. Life experience tends to change people,
sometimes in the most drastic of ways.Perhaps it wasn't the ending I
wanted, but it was what I was given.I still love him with all of my
heart, but he'll never know; I'll never tell him.That day, three years
ago, I learned something very important; although a little too
late.Never regret anything...Live life to the fullest......and take
risks.XxXx

 

The preceeding was a work of fiction. Any statements regarding any person, place, or other entity (real or imaginary) is the sole responibility of the author of this work of fiction. Fan Works Inc. takes no responsibility for the content of user submitted stories. All stories based on real people are works of fiction and do not necessarily reflect on the nature of the individuals featured. All stories based on other copyrighted works are written with authors knowing that these works violate copyright laws.

Please see the Terms of Service for more information.

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