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Anime/Manga Fan Fiction >> Full Metal Alchemist >> Fullmetal Alchemist- The Scars and Secrets of Human Transmutation >> Reviews

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Part #3 - Chapter 1: The State Alchemy Examination
quamp                    (ANONYMOUS) N/A 04/19/2008 09:59:02pm

Okay, you've got some potential, but you've got a lot of problems here.
1. Hiromu Arikawa is female.
2. You have Samsu and Ed calling each other nii-san and nii-chan. This is a respectful term for an OLDER sibling only. Thus you've got them contradicting each other as to whom is older.
3. Samsu is a Mary Sue. Pure and simple.

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